Kohli, Gayle and the game for Chinnaswamy's throne

April 24 was an IPL tradition. A tacky green-coloured cake and a facepalming victim - who despite having braved years and years of ovations, crowd intrusions and heavy adjectivization - is still unable to hide his embarrassment at the Wankhede's newest obsession of public cake cutting as roars of 'Sachin Sachin' fuse seamlessly into what this fuss is originally all about, 'Happy Birthday to you'. But he'd play along to the IPL Governing Council's random scheduling year after year, speaking about what he's been up to in life, marvel at how the club culture in the country has grown and even quietly plug in his forthcoming movie. All of this with a match in progress in the background.

Alas, India is no theocracy, and even